17.12.03
Culturally,
1. Danish: We sat at a friend's house making Christmas decorations for her militaristically Danish Christmas. I covered myself with acrylic paint; made something hideous and nameless out of an empty Pringles tube; and created fifteen foot of paper chain. In Denmark, after Christmas, the decorations are thrown away, to be made again next year, in a similar fashion.
2. Chinese. He is taking us to China town to eat Chinese food the 'real' way. He insists he is ordering for everyone. That's fine, I told him, but no seafood. He asked how I felt about chicken feet. No, I told him, none of those either. But they always take the claws off first, he said, hoping, miraculously, that declawed chicken feet would be more appealing.
3. Geekish. This weekend, getting up at four in the morning, and returning at two the following morning, I am going to London, to spend lots of money on overpriced game books, and possibly to see Anthony Daniels. Copying a friend from last year, I am converting all my money into two pound coins (large, embroidered gold and silver discs) so that I can pay for everything in gold pieces.
4. Welsh. They want me to be the back of a Mari Llwyd for New Year. A Mari Llwyd is someone with a horse skull for a mask under a white sheet that roams the streets on New Year's Eve. None of us know why.
5. American. My mother, annoyed that I missed Thanksgiving, has declared next Thursday an honourary Thanksgiving day. We will be eating our traditional Thanksgiving dinner of pizza and glass-bottled coke.
6. German. For the third time in as many days someone asks, Is your surname German? Yes, I say. I think so.
7. Jewish. I explained, for the second time, to a friend of very little memory, that no, Jews don't celebrate Christmas. Then I sent my Jewish aunt and uncle their Christmas presents. I expect they open them during Channukah. We open anything they send to us at Christmas.
8. English. So you're Welsh? he said. You know I never would have guessed. There's nothing about you that's even remotely Welsh.
I said, I know. That's what everyone says.
1. Danish: We sat at a friend's house making Christmas decorations for her militaristically Danish Christmas. I covered myself with acrylic paint; made something hideous and nameless out of an empty Pringles tube; and created fifteen foot of paper chain. In Denmark, after Christmas, the decorations are thrown away, to be made again next year, in a similar fashion.
2. Chinese. He is taking us to China town to eat Chinese food the 'real' way. He insists he is ordering for everyone. That's fine, I told him, but no seafood. He asked how I felt about chicken feet. No, I told him, none of those either. But they always take the claws off first, he said, hoping, miraculously, that declawed chicken feet would be more appealing.
3. Geekish. This weekend, getting up at four in the morning, and returning at two the following morning, I am going to London, to spend lots of money on overpriced game books, and possibly to see Anthony Daniels. Copying a friend from last year, I am converting all my money into two pound coins (large, embroidered gold and silver discs) so that I can pay for everything in gold pieces.
4. Welsh. They want me to be the back of a Mari Llwyd for New Year. A Mari Llwyd is someone with a horse skull for a mask under a white sheet that roams the streets on New Year's Eve. None of us know why.
5. American. My mother, annoyed that I missed Thanksgiving, has declared next Thursday an honourary Thanksgiving day. We will be eating our traditional Thanksgiving dinner of pizza and glass-bottled coke.
6. German. For the third time in as many days someone asks, Is your surname German? Yes, I say. I think so.
7. Jewish. I explained, for the second time, to a friend of very little memory, that no, Jews don't celebrate Christmas. Then I sent my Jewish aunt and uncle their Christmas presents. I expect they open them during Channukah. We open anything they send to us at Christmas.
8. English. So you're Welsh? he said. You know I never would have guessed. There's nothing about you that's even remotely Welsh.
I said, I know. That's what everyone says.
